Okay, so we're back in the time of pirates.  We're on a ship captained by the
Dread Pirate Richards.  We're sailing along one day, looking for a ship to raid
and loot.  Another ship appears suddenly, and the man in our crow's nest shouts
"Ship ho!"  Our captain calls out to the lookout, asking how many men they
have.  "About 100 sir."  The ship docks with ours, and their men board our
ship.  The first mate runs up to Captain Richards and asks what should be done.

"Yargh.  Take down the sails, tell the men to fight, and fetch me my sword and
my red shirt."  The frst mate does as he's instructed, and returns with the
Captain's sword and red shirt, only to find him deep in battle along with the
other men.  The mate runs up to him and hands him his things, and the captain
changes his shirt and begins swashbuckling and all that good stuff.  The fight
last for hours, but finally our ship wins, and the remaining men from the other
ship retreat, and they sail away.

Afterward the first mate asks our Captain "That was quite a battle, sir.  But
tell me one thing.  Why were you concerned with your red shirt when we were
under attack?"

"Well boy, I knew it would be a long difficult battle.  I wanted my red shirt
because I knew that if I was wearing it, the other men couldn't see me
bleeding, and they'd be inspired to fight longer and harder."

A few days later, the same thing happens.  The lookout in the crow's nest cries
out "Ship HO!"  The Captain asks how many they have.  "About 200 sir!"  The
mate asks what should be done, and again the captain replies to take down the
sails, tell the men to fight, and bring him his sword and his red shirt.  Again
we fight firecely for hours, and in the end, we're victorious.  The mate
realizes the Captain's red shirt is very important to our success in battle.

Another few days later, the same thing happens.  "Ship HO!!"  The men prepare
for battle and take down the sails on their own.  The captain asks how many
men they have.  "About 500 sir!"  The mate asks the Captain what else should be
done.

"Yaaarrrggghhh.  Fetch me my brown pants."