Here's mine:

I once had to call in because I stank:

A skunk had crawled into the air-inlet of my furnace, and when the furnace kicked on, it burnt the poor skunk and it let loose with all it had. Was sitting watching TV when we started to smell skunk, and then got progressively worse, then unbelievably worse. It was horrible. My wife immediately bolted for the door and went to stay at her sister's. I, for some unremembered reason, decided to "tough it out."

I guess I was the talk of the office for my "not coming in excuse" (I was able to VPN in and get my work done.) and nobody believed me. Until I came back the day after, still stinking after taking many showers. (It had accumulated on my clothes, and I couldn't get that out.) I worked for about an hour and then they nicely asked me to go work from home for the next few days. It was really really bad.

What's yours?