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10/23/2016 7:34:43 PM
Viewed: 346 times

Finally, after way too long of messing with a plugin that simply did not work, I obtained a new picture upload plugin and now you can upload pictures inline with your message posts!

12/8/2014 7:41:20 PM
Viewed: 537 times

Once again, MessageBase is brought back from the ashes. This time re-written using ASP.NET MVC 5, Bootstrap, HTML 5, and just way better programming practices.

3/9/2011 12:17:22 PM
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Broke pretty much everything when installing some .NET 4.0 software on the same server as MessageBase. [Didn't do my homework on installing 4.0 apps] Had to rebuild from scratch. :(

2/24/2011 2:04:45 PM
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 Some people say it looks terrible.

12/25/2010 4:46:09 PM
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HCG Diet Information

10/14/2010 8:33:11 PM
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We are controlled in lockstep by the invisible forcefield of the unlikely concept of wealth.

10/11/2010 7:40:42 PM
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We are an adolescent species that refuses to face up to the responsibility that sentience demands. It's time to grow up or die.

6/15/2010 1:01:44 AM
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Its not funny bro! Do you know how many people there are down there? And crocodiles too. Crocodiles could go extinct, bro! All because of mankind being assholes. What if crocodiles are like the keystone on the food chain that has been keeping the genetically modified mutant corn at bay?

You won't be laughing in October, when Illinois transforms into thousands of acres of walking, slavering corn plant monsters bent on the destruction of humanity. No. You'll be too busy running for your life, and wishing to God you'd made preparations when that guy on the internet told you all this shiat was coming down.

But you won't have listened, and you and your family will die bro. First little Aiden, because he's only 3 and can't run very fast, then pubescent Brittany, lured by text messages to her doom, then your wife, torn from your arms in an ambush and devoured nosily as you fled, crying.

All because you didn't listen to that guy on the internet.

2/2/2010 12:04:54 PM
Viewed: 266 times

Homeopathic charka-enhancing organic thetan-free Jesus crystals guaranteed to get you raptured to safety in 2012 when Obama the Muslim reptilian shapeshifter from Nibiru reveals his Communist New World Order plot to fake global warming, the moon landing and the 9/11 attacks as a prelude to putting everyone in Fema camps.

12/10/2009 7:10:02 PM
Viewed: 306 times

Created a quick & dirty tool when you need to know all the element IDs in an HTML, DHTML, or AJAX source file.

12/8/2009 2:29:27 PM
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Finally wrote an RSS Feed Generator for MessageBase!

11/25/2009 10:28:54 AM
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Look at my button down striped shirt! Fucking look at it! This shirt means one thing! I’m coming home with some pussy tonight! That’s right! It’s been a long week at the office and it’s time to blow off a little steam! I am a Junior Vice President! I have business cards that say “Junior Vice President” on them! They’re glossy and magnificent! Here! Have one! Take it!

My boys are coming out with me tonight! They all have striped shirts too!

I figure we’ll kick off the night with some Golden Tee! I am going to smack the shit out of that little white ball! It’s going to be so fucking loud! I’ll bet I can drive that pretend golf ball 600 fucking yards tonight! I’m that fucking pumped!

I can almost taste those Jager Bombs right now! I fucking love Red Bull! I put it on my God damned cereal! I’m crushing one right now!

I’m thinking about buying a boat this year!

I’m gonna fight someone tonight! I pray to God someone makes eye contact with me! I will beat his ass! And God help him if he gets any blood on my striped shirt! If he does, I’ll scrub it out with his dick and some bleach! I mean it!

I’m gonna grind on girls asses tonight! You heard me! When I see a group of girls dancing in a circle, I will select the most attractive one and dry hump her until it hurts! I will rub my cock against her so that she can feel my throbbing hard on!

I will valet tonight!

11/12/2009 3:17:48 PM
Viewed: 293 times

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11/12/2009 3:16:45 PM
Viewed: 286 times
No Summary
9/14/2009 4:36:14 PM
Viewed: 320 times

You are my arch nemisis. I see you wandering around as I go about my IT Computer Nerd business: Tall. Middle Eastern. Pot Belly. We catch each others eye every now and then and give each other a slight nod. I know you, I know what you do and I am on to your games.

I saw you this morning, we made eye contact. You nodded and took another bite of whatever Death-Ass producing garbage you fuel up on that makes the bathroom, smell like the inside of a dead monkey's colon, and nodded at me. I got you this time, farker.

I give you my icey grin and nod back, then hurry back to my office. It's almost noon, and that's the time you like to run to the toilet and preform your daily ASS JIHAD on all the people just trying to wash their hands. Maybe in your country there is no commen sense that would tell you that lunch time = hand wash time. People want to get clean and eat, not be fumigated with the high octane liquid shiat attack you subjigate them too.

But I got you this time. Yeah farker I GOT SOMETHING COOKING UP FOR YOU! Two egg sandwiches with cheese. Greasy sausage patties. A couple glasses of Tang. Some leftover Chinese food. A Twix. Root Beer Soda. Some steamed brocoli I had in the fridge. A Hot Pocket with peperonni and cheese. A Chocolate Poptart. And like a cherry on top ... a McDonald's Quaterpounder with cheese.

I never eat this shiat, it's all greasy and farking nasty, but today is the day I fight back. I go out for a quick mile jog and almsot die. My stomach feels like there are two midgets fighting to the death inside there. I walk back to work, ass clenched tighter than a virgin's thighs at Church.

Great. The hot chick from next door wants to chat. She assumes the sweat on my face and arms is from running. She doesn't realize that it's a cold sweat induced by my severe sphicter trauma. She finally shuts up and I stagger to the Death Ass Arena.

You are there already in your favorite stall: The one right next to the farking sinks. You stupid, socially retarded fark. Fine. You have yet to begin your daily purge of Middle Eastern Ass Stew. I enter the stall next to you and drop my pants in preperation of the upcomming battle.

Your opening slavo is fired: A sloppy wet fart with a solid-shot closer. I laugh and show you the power of Advanced American Foodstuffs.

The tuba fart I unleash echos off the walls and shrinks my waistline about an inch. The guy at the urinal laughs as I slap the wall between you and I and say "Back to YOU, Kajid!". You are silent, I assume you know who I am and that the time has come for us to battle. I know you are summoning your intestinal fortitude for full out war.

You do not dissapoint me.

With a hissing "SSSShhhhhzzzzzzzzz!" you squirt out a deadly spray of ass juice that pollutes the air and makes my head swim. The pisser at the urinal is no longer laughing, he quickly zips up and runs for the door. He did not stop to wash his hands, instead opting to head for the hills. I cover my mouth and nose with my shirt and the black spots dissapear from my vision. My head clears. I am ready.

"AAaaaaaaaRRRRRGGGHHH!" I yell, as I drop Big Tim. That's short for "Big Timber" ... AKA "Mississippi Butt Log".

Quick-fire farts stutter out of my ass, as I push the monster log from the shiat Dimension into our reality. The beefy, yeasty stench easily overpowers the Indian Ass Gutter oder of your previous attack. Mega Turd hits the water in the bowl with a mighty splash, the reek is that of a dead whale slowly ripening in the hot, tropical sun. I catch my breath and wipe my brow, and start to pat myself on the back. I should have known the battle was not over.

The only thing I can think of is that you must has completly unzipped your ass to your elbow. That's the only way I could begin to explain the lumpy, creamy splashs falling out of your ass into the toilet. It sounds like you are pouring a gallon of strawberry shake with whole strawberries in it into the shiatter. I see the hairs on my arms start to curl from the horrid stench wafting up from under your stall. I shudder and sway on my throne, unsure if I will survive.

I have no choice. I must employ the Deal Breaker. I hunker down and clench my hands together. My fingers twitch and entwine like a nest of snakes, almost like I am running through a series of ancient Ninja Hand Symbols. My feet lift up onto the toes and my legs start to shake.

"You want to play??" I growls. A low moaning comes from my stomach, like a dinosaur calling into a swampy, foggy night. "YOU GOT IT! AAAAAAHHHHHH!"

Like Cloud summoning The Knights of the Round in Final Fantasy 7, I summon the Excalibur of Turd Demons to destroy my enemy. Hot magma-like shiat rockets out of my ass, releasing a noxious, sticky cloud of deadly recal perfume. I hear you gag and see your feet shuffle around, but you can't get away, can you? No. You can't.

Veins throb on my neck and temples as the turd monster tears itself from my bowels. My lips skin back from my now clenched teeth and I try not to scream. Your roll of toilet paper rolls into my stall. You must have torn it from the wall with numb fingers in an attempt to "Wipe and Scoot". Too late. MUCH too late!

Oders pound you with merciless fists: Rotten Fruitcake stuffed with boiled chicken assholes. Hammered shiat-logs served on a bed of week old white rice. Rosie O'Donnel's racid crotch farts. The smell of your mom's dank, hairy Middle Eastern armpits.

Your stall door bangs open and you stagger out. You take three unsteady steps to the door and can barely open it wide enough to slip out. I laugh at you before you leave. "Yeah! RUN, farker!" I yell, and laugh again. You say nothing.

It's all over except for the clean up. fark with me again, you shiat filled Anal Terrorist. Me and my ass will be waiting.

11/5/2008 4:36:45 PM
Viewed: 355 times

In this new day, from now on, everyone is required to use fully descriptive terms when using the word "Liberal".

Do you hate legal liberals (People who want to make lots of new laws), economic liberals (People who throw lots of money at things, like bankster bailouts), or social liberals (Live and let live types)? Or some other kind of format("{0} liberals", [Descriptor])?

Liberal alone means nothing to most of us. In the words of Elisa: "Come, Come. Elucidate."

9/29/2008 9:50:31 PM
Viewed: 299 times

We can start flushing the rascals out by sending a strong message to congress before the final vote. Tomorrow night (September 30) at 9 PM Eastern Daylight Saving Time (8 PM Central, 7 PM Mountain, and 6 PM Pacific) we can flush our toilets. Across America hundreds of thousands of toilets will be flushed. Communities throughout this great nation will feel the effect of a temporary fall in water pressure. This will let those rascals in D.C. feel the power of the people. It might even stop their rascally madness.

5/30/2008 8:41:50 PM
Viewed: 391 times

Found the problem. Has to do with technical details of how IIS (Internet Information Services, the web server software this site runs on.) works.

5/30/2008 1:54:59 PM
Viewed: 368 times

Something is broken with the MessageBase software. Lots of Ajax errors and flaky behaviour. I'm trying track down the problem, will post when it's fixed.

5/1/2008 11:27:10 AM
Viewed: 384 times

Outdoor fucking starts today!! :)

2/2/2008 7:39:20 PM
Viewed: 331 times

Remember, remember the 5th of November. The gunpowder, treason, and plot. I know of no reason why the gunpowder treason should ever be forgot.

2/2/2008 7:38:53 PM
Viewed: 329 times

DHMO - It's found everywhere:

Each year, Dihydrogen Monoxide is a known causative component in many thousands of deaths and is a major contributor to millions upon millions of dollars in damage to property and the environment. Some of the known perils of Dihydrogen Monoxide are:

   * Death due to accidental inhalation of DHMO, even in small quantities.
   * Prolonged exposure to solid DHMO causes severe tissue damage.
   * Excessive ingestion produces a number of unpleasant though not
     typically life-threatening side-effects.
   * DHMO is a major component of acid rain.
   * Gaseous DHMO can cause severe burns.
   * Contributes to soil erosion.
   * Leads to corrosion and oxidation of many metals.
   * Contamination of electrical systems often causes short-circuits.
   * Exposure decreases effectiveness of automobile brakes.
   * Found in biopsies of pre-cancerous tumors and lesions.
   * Given to vicious dogs involved in recent deadly attacks.
   * Often associated with killer cyclones in the U.S. Midwest and
     elsewhere, and in hurricanes including deadly storms in Florida,
     New Orleans and other areas of the southeastern U.S.
   * Thermal variations in DHMO are a suspected contributor to the El
     Nino weather effect.

Despite the known dangers of DHMO, it continues to be used daily by industry, government, and even in private homes across the U.S. and worldwide. Some of the well-known uses of Dihydrogen Monoxide are:

   * as an industrial solvent and coolant,
   * in nuclear power plants,
   * by the U.S. Navy in the propulsion systems of some older vessels,
   * by elite athletes to improve performance,
   * in the production of Styrofoam,
   * in biological and chemical weapons manufacture,
   * in the development of genetically engineering crops and animals,
   * as a spray-on fire suppressant and retardant,
   * in so-called "family planning" or "reproductive health" clinics,
   * as a major ingredient in many home-brewed bombs,
   * as a byproduct of hydrocarbon combustion in furnaces and air
     conditioning compressor operation,
   * in cult rituals,
   * by the Church of Scientology on their members and their members'
     families (although surprisingly, many members recently have
     contacted DHMO.org to vehemently deny such use),
   * by both the KKK and the NAACP during rallies and marches,
   * by members of Congress who are under investigation for financial
     corruption and inappropriate IM behavior,
   * by the clientele at a number of bath houses in New York City and
     San Francisco,
   * historically, in Hitler's death camps in Nazi Germany, and in
     prisons in Turkey, Serbia, Croatia, Libya, Iraq and Iran,
   * in World War II prison camps in Japan, and in prisons in China,
     for various forms of torture,
   * during many recent religious and ethnic wars in the Middle East,
   * by many terrorist organizations including al Quaeda,
   * in community swimming pools to maintain
     chemical balance,
   * by software engineers,
     including those producing the DCOM software SDK,
   * in animal research laboratories, and
   * in pesticide production and distribution.

What you may find surprising are some of the products and places where DHMO is used, but which for one reason or another, are not normally made part of public presentations on the dangers to the lives of our family members and friends. Among these startling uses are:

   * as an additive to food products, including jarred baby food and
     baby formula, and even in many soups, carbonated beverages and
     supposedly "all-natural" fruit juices
   * in cough medicines and other liquid pharmaceuticals,
   * in spray-on oven cleaners,
   * in shampoos, shaving creams, deodorants and numerous other
     bathroom products,
   * in bathtub bubble products marketed to children,
   * as a preservative in grocery store fresh produce sections,
   * in the production of beer by all the major beer distributors,
   * in the coffee available at major coffee houses in the US and abroad,
   * in Formula One race cars, although its use is regulated by the
     Formula One Racing Commission, and
   * as a target of ongoing NASA planetary and stellar research.

Find out more at: http://www.dhmo.org/coverup.html

5/7/2007 6:02:54 PM
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3/30/2005 7:20:05 PM
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3/6/2005 9:56:49 AM
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9/22/2004 10:55:07 AM
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4/24/2004 11:50:09 PM
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11/17/2003 8:50:09 AM
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2/11/2002 12:59:52 AM
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9/20/2001 8:02:01 PM
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4/7/2001 5:48:14 PM
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12/20/2000 11:39:44 AM
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2/2/2000 9:40:38 AM
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10/5/1999 11:50:00 PM
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8/28/1999 4:35:39 PM
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7/10/1999 10:34:07 AM
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7/6/1999 11:57:59 AM
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7/6/1999 10:40:32 AM
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7/4/1999 12:39:43 AM
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